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Today I just want to talk about what I realized after the last heartbreaking loss Nole suffered regarding my coping mechanism after tough losses and I'm sure many of you, whether you are avid Nole fans or avid fans of another player, can relate.
OK, so I've noticed that about 5 minutes after every devastating loss (where I just think poor Nole and feel like crying) I go through the 5 famous stages of grief, a.k.a DABDA and I'll use Monday's lost as an example:
1. Denial - "I'm fine, It's OK".
2. Anger - "Damn you Rafa! Who needs 7 RG???", "Why did they stop the match on Sunday when Nole was on fire and turning that final around? Why didn't continue to play at 8 PM local time if it wasn't raining???, "This is so unfair!!! I hate Rafa and uncle Toni, two cry-babies!!!".
3. Bargaining - "Nole has to win RG next year or the year after that, that will make everything alright", "Nole has to win Wimby/Olympics/USO now and get revenge on Rafa, Rafa can't sweep all these trophies too :(".
4. Depression - "Why is this happening???", "Now, Rafa will win Wimby and USO and take the no. 1 spot from Nole and it will be the worst season EVER :( :( :(", "Nole will never win RG, he lost his chance :( :( :( :(".
5. Acceptance - "So Nole couldn't win
the Nole-Slam, big
deal...Fedal couldn't
accomplish that feat either", "It just wasn't meant to be", "Nole will win RG one day :)", "Nole's still no. 1 ,a.k.a the best player in the world, and he will be just fine...and revenge will be so damn sweet :))".
6 comments:
I skipped the whole denial and went straight to the anger and then emptiness on Monday. Rafa can keep his RG, if he wants it so, FOR NOW. I wonder if uncle Toni ever feeds Rafa, 'cause he is always biting and chewing the trophies. How good can a piece of metal taste anyway. When No1e had the lead in the fourth, Rafa started to whine about the weather, the balls were too heavy and so on. http://eurosport.yahoo.com/video/10062012/58/nadal-calls-time-rainy-match.html, there's the clip just in case. Give me a break, Rafa was in trouble, he knew it and he wanted out! GAH! Well, enough of RG, away with negative thinking and we're off to the Wimbledon grass courts real soon!
Thanks for sharing, Eeva :) Now that I think about it, I was really angry even before Nole lost...Since they stopped play on Sunday, I was upset with Rafa and Uncle Toni and after Nole lost, I was angry again all day long and yesterday too, but I'm over it now...Like you said, let Rafa have it and let's move on to Wimby, no point in dwelling on it. P.S. Watching the video pissed me off again but only for for a second.
I skipped the denial too, I guess I am somewhere around 4- Depression at the moment :-(
And sometimes the anger when I think about his cheating and Uncle Toni ugh ugh ugh.....
Hopefully not for long though, I am hoping there will be nothing to be depressed about in Wimbledon :-)
Janet, I know what you mean...I didn't go through these 5 stages one after one and I'm not done yet actually, I keep going from denial to anger, from anger to depression, and vice versa. I guess it will take more time to get to a real acceptance, maybe we'll never get there...I still don't accept what happened last year in RG :( That's my denail, thinking I'm over it...I'm not.
Hi!
I like the way you describe the five steps, moran, it really hits the mark! I know these five steps, too, although not necessarily in this order, either... I was mostly sad and a bit angry, especially after that d--- rain break on Sunday...
But then I was also so proud to see how Nole took it - he is just such a great sportsman!!! How he can be so authentic and yet so generous, not trying to hide his disappointment but showing such outstanding sportsmanship - and that made me sort of happy again... :-))
Thanks for the feedbak and for sharing your feelings, Ludivine :) BTW, I'm so proud of our boy, too :D
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